This article was originally published at Redeeming Marriages.

The six months following the disclosure of my spouse’s serial adultery—and the ensuing four-year separation—were the most difficult times of my life. They especially affected my sleep. I had been married for 19 years and was accustomed to having my husband beside me in bed.

I knew how desperately I needed sleep, but it eluded me. I would lay awake sobbing night after night. Usually, I would drift off from sheer exhaustion in the early hours of the morning. But I could feel the inevitable pull of depression from my sleep deprivation. With three young children to care for, I couldn’t afford not to be at my sharpest.

If your marriage is broken—whether your spouse still sleeps beside you, sleeps in another room, or you are separated—I’m sure you can relate.

Depending on your sleeping arrangements with a sexually-addicted spouse—same bed, in-house separation, or out-of-house separation—being proactive about the time period between when you climb into bed and when you fall asleep can build enormous security and promote deep, peaceful sleep.

It starts with your mindset…

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Also published on Medium.